The Brewers are tickled pink that they’re on Curt Schilling’s Maybe List.

So are the Cardinals.

The Astros re-signed veteran catcher Brad Ausmus so he could back-up the guy the team actually wants to see behind the plate, J.R. Towles.

The Reds are bringing back Adam Dunn, Scott Hatteberg, Javier Valentin, and, if he’s willing to return for less money, “Everyday Eddie.”

And on Monday, the Pirates will have a new manager, whose name will be Trent Jewett (AAA Indianapolis manager), Joel Skinner (Indians third-base coach), John Russell (Class AAA Lehigh Valley manager), Dave Jauss (Dodgers bench coach; son of Chicago sportswriter, Bill Jauss) or Joey “The Biter” Cora.

If it’s Cora, the Pirates should immediately sign up a local dentist or orthodontist to some sort of sponsorship deal. I realize I have now broken the five-sentence promise, but it’s worth it to spread an old, never substantiated rumor about a member of the White Sox family.